We've been told a lie.
A damaging lie.
That at 18 we should know what we want to do with our lives and choose a degree. And even worse, that no matter what happens, we should follow the profession that this degree leads to.
The problem with these expectations is that it's impossible to know at 18 – or even 22-23 – what profession you want to follow. You can't know for sure without first having the slightest practical experience in that particular industry.
This way of thinking, imposed on us by parents and society, negatively affects us, filling us with anxiety, pressure, and even thoughts that we are “lost.” In reality, we are just beginning our journey.
It's very difficult to know those answers at 18 and 23 years old. So, to me, success at this stage is actively working towards finding those answers.
Only by trying out what we like will this answer come to us. Through work, an undergraduate/master's degree or by starting a personal project. Even while being a student, there are internships and volunteering jobs.
This way you will be able to determine what really fills you and adjust your route accordingly.
These stereotypes regarding one's career path, however, become even more harmful when comparison enters the discussion. Comparison with others. How many times have we been told phrases like "other kids your age are already doing a master's degree" or "look at John who's found a job abroad"?
You can never know what life is like on the other side, no matter how it may seem from the outside. That is why comparing our own path with someone else's does not help us. Each of us walks their own unique path. All of us with different obstacles and help.
An acquaintance may have found a job at a large company, but it's unknown to us if they really like it and what the daily stress and pressure they face every day.
A friend may have gone to an excellent university abroad. It is unknown, of course, whether they will ultimately follow a professional path that suits them.
This is not a criticism of either graduate degrees or "good" jobs. It is a criticism of the mindset of comparison and evaluation of success solely by titles.
Is success in life a position of prestige and benefits, or is it the joy of going to work and feeling like you are making an impact? Is it both?
The answer is different for everyone, and personal success is solely identified with the definition each of us gives it.
